Divorce Statistics and Studies Blog

Separations last years; only 79% become divorces - study

About 79% of married couples who separate end up getting divorced, suggest new estimates of the incidence and length of separations.

"Separation is very common and is more common than immediate divorce," said researcher Dmitry Tumin of Ohio State University at a presentation at the annual meeting of the Population Association of America, which ended Sunday. "Most separations last one year or less, but a few drag on a decade or more before ending in divorce. Other separations stay unresolved."

"The decision to separate is driven by time spent in the first marriage, and for women, by the presence of young children," Tumin said. He co-authored the research with sociologist Zhenchao Qian, also of Ohio State.

When women have children younger than age 5, their likelihood of separating rather than divorcing right away is increased, Tumin says.

The analysis was based on data from 7,272 individuals who were ages 14-22 in 1979 and had ever married. Of those, 51% were still married. Among the rest, 60% report having gone through a marital separation, with most (79%) ultimately divorcing.

The research found that the average length of a first separation is about four years. For respondents who divorce after separating, it's three years. And for the small number who reunite, the average separation is two years, the study found.

"In fact, we don't observe any separations that end with the couple getting back together after a three-year period, so three years is the point of no return," Tumin said. "After three years, the only outcomes observed are ongoing separation or divorce."

The research found that about 7% of separations lasted 10 or more years. Among different races and ethnic groups, he says Hispanics and blacks are more likely to be separated than are whites, and once separated, they are more likely to stay separated than divorce. ...

"Splitting? 79% of marital separations end in divorce" By Sharon Jayson, USA TODAY, 5/6/12

 

Study pinpoints what makes once-happy couples divorce

"What Kinds of Happy Couples Eventually Get Divorced?" by Alice G. Walton inThe Atlantic, 4/16/12:

"In a new study, the researchers followed 136 married couples who all reported being very satisfied in the first four years of their marriages. They questioned each spouse periodically over a period of 10 years, asking them to rate statements about marriage satisfaction, level of commitment, personality traits, stress levels, problem solving abilities, and how supportive they were with their partners. Some skills and traits were rated by the researchers, as the couples discussed relationship difficulties in the lab. ...

Couples who went on to divorce were more likely to be poorer communicators, and tended to display more negative emotions and support mechanisms than people who stayed married.

For example, the couples who went on to divorce were more likely to use blame and invalidation in their communication efforts. They were more likely to discourage a spouse from expressing his or her feelings, and to display "inappropriate pessimism." Husbands who were more verbally aggressive early on were also more likely to be part of couples who went on to divorce later.

Though the study was small, it has some big implications. The communication and emotional issues seen at the outset of the marriages may contribute to the success of the marriage in the long run, and help predict it. Even more important is the idea that these significant interpersonal issues can exist despite the fact that partners simultaneously report being very satisfied with the marriage. This odd coexistence is one that married (and soon-to-be married) people and mental health experts should keep in mind.

 [Link to study: J Fam Psychol. 2012 Feb;26(1):1-10. Epub 2011 Oct 31.: "Why do even satisfied newlyweds eventually go on to divorce?" by Lavner JA, Bradbury TN]

Another new study explored the relationship between one's general level of life satisfaction and his or her satisfaction with marriage, and found that it's a two-way street. In fact, having more life satisfaction increased one's odds for a happy marriage, and improving one's marital satisfaction was linked to greater happiness in life. The take-home message of this study is that life satisfaction is not only a result of a happy marriage, but, in large degree, it can actually help predict it.

[citing J Fam Psychol. 2012 Feb;26(1):165-70. "Examining changes in relationship adjustment and life satisfaction in marriage." By Stanley SM, Ragan EP, Rhoades GK, Markman HJ.]

 

Couples' divorce decision-making studied by divorce lawyer/mediator turned family studies Ph.D.

Helping Couples in the Divorce Decision-Making “Wilderness”

April 16, 2012 by  Alan J. Hawkins

 

Military divorce rate keeps climbing; USAF worst, responds with Marriage Care

New stats

The divorce rate among airmen today is almost 64 percent higher than in 2001, and is the highest in the military, according to a recent Defense Department report.

A decade ago, when the U.S. invaded Afghanistan, the rate stood at 2.5 divorces per 100 marriages. In 2011, the number jumped to 3.9. The rate has climbed steadily in the past decade except in 2005 and in 2008, when it dropped ever so slightly, according to Air Force statistics obtained by Air Force Times.

... the divorce rate military-wide is the highest it’s been since 1999; 30,000 marriages ended in divorce by the end of fiscal 2011.

Of those, 7,534 were in the Air Force. Most of them — 6,743 — were enlisted airmen, for a divorce rate of 4.6 percent.

When broken down by career field, women — both enlisted and officer — have higher divorce rates overall than their male counterparts. Of the 20 highest divorce rates by career field and gender in 2010, the most recent breakdown by career field available, only two belonged to the men: Male officers who were aides-de-camp saw a divorce rate of 4 per 100 marriages and enlisted men in the medical career field had a divorce rate of 3.92 per 100 marriages. They ranked 18th and 19th, respectively.

From "Air Force divorce rate highest in military" - Air Force Times.

Military-wide statistics were reported in an earlier story, "Military divorce rate rises slightly in 2011" - Air Force Times. Excerpts: 

... roughly one in every 27 married troops got a divorce in 2011. The percentage of marriages that ended in divorce during fiscal 2011 ticked up to 3.7 percent. The USMC rate was just slightly lower, 3.6. The officer corps divorce rate rose to 2.1 percent, up from 1.9 percent in 2010. The divorce rate for enlisted service members remained flat at 4.1.

The article on USAF divorce speculates about the reasons for divorces and for the increase, and then reports on the effects of it and what the Air Force is doing about it:

“When marriages are crumbling, it affects readiness, it affects unit morale, it affects unit cohesion,” he said. “When someone is going through a divorce, it makes it very hard for them to focus on their jobs. When an airman is going through a divorce, it affects all the airmen they work with.”

About 500 active-duty chaplains across the Air Force offer marriage counseling, but the Air Force is making a bigger push to keep marriages intact and healthy through Marriage Care retreats. Created three years ago and offered by the Chaplain Corps College, Marriage Care retreats were designed by Air Force chaplains specifically for airmen and their spouses. ... about 50 Air Force chaplains were trained to offer a Marriage Care retreat, and about 20 bases were involved in the effort. The Air Force is expanding the program as it trains more chaplains and puts more money into the program. ... in fiscal 2011 there were 31 weekend retreats, and more than 1,200 people, airmen and spouses, attended.

 

 

 

 

Study of Lincoln's 131 Illinois divorce cases

A summary of the records of Lincoln's law firm's divorce cases, by Stacy Pratt McDermott, was the subject of a recent Wall Street Journal blog post. Statistics include which sex filed how often; what percentage of plaintiffs of each sex were granted the divorces they sought; what grounds were claimed and how each kind of case was treated; and child custody and support outcomes.

The full study is "Lincoln Legal Briefs #45" but you have to scroll down a couple screens to get to it. It also includes descriptions of several individual cases.

30% of Divorced Women Knew He Was Mr. Wrong All Along!

"The Shocking Truth for Thirty Percent of Divorced Women" by Jennifer Gauvain on Huffington Post

More discussion of the study, by the same author: "Why So Many Of Us Marry The Wrong Person"

 

 

Dueling banalities: The 9 Reasons for Divorce vs. The 5 Reasons for Divorce

"5 Common Reasons for Divorce" by Jennifer Chang on simpledivorceadvice.com lists:

• Infidelity
• Growing Apart
• Abuse
• Finances
• Sex

But it recharacterizes them as "really the end process of a marriage in trouble." It says "In the United States Infidelity is the cause for a third of divorces", which works out to be the most common reason for divorce. That is the only item in the article that looks like it is based on any hard evidence. There are many other claims about the real reasons behind the above reasons, but with no citations or descriptions of sources it is impossible to tell whether any of it is based on evidence, or is just conventional wisdom, urban myths, etc.

 

"Understanding the Top Reasons for Divorce", by simpledivorceadvice.com (no byline), is a decently commonsensical breakdown of nine common reasons for divorce, although it does not claim to be based on anything scientific or authoritative. There are many equally accurate ways to describe the causes of many divorces. Unlike in other areas of the law, it can be hard or impossible to look at the chain of causes and effects and identify which is the "proximate cause". There are more immediate, and more fundamental, causes, and ultimately the reasons behind why some choose divorce, and why some behave in ways that provoke divorce, are "because they can." The Nine Reasons are:

• Damaging Communication, 
• Financial Difficulties, 
• Infidelity
• Abuse mental and physical
• Addiction of all kinds
• Unmet Expectations
• Commitment Issues
• Change in Goals 
• Stepfamily Breakdown

New study: What makes some couples divorce?

Why do even satisfied newlyweds eventually go on to divorce?

Lavner, Justin A.; Bradbury, Thomas N.

Journal of Family Psychology, Oct 31, 2011.

Abstract: Although divorce typically follows an extended period of unhappiness that begins early in marriage, some couples who are very happy throughout the first several years of marriage will also go on to divorce. This study aimed to identify risk factors early in marriage that distinguish initially satisfied couples who eventually divorce from those who remain married. We identified 136 couples reporting stably high levels of relationship satisfaction in the first 4 years of marriage. We compared the couples who went on to divorce by the 10-year follow-up with the couples who remained married on initial measures of commitment, observed communication, stress, and personality. Divorcing couples displayed more negative communication, emotion, and social support as newlyweds compared with couples who did not divorce. No significant differences were found in the other domains, in relationship satisfaction, or in positive behaviors. Overall, results indicate that even couples who are very successful at navigating the early years of marriage can be vulnerable to later dissolution if their interpersonal exchanges are poorly regulated. We speculate that, paradoxically, the many strengths possessed by these couples may mask their potent interpersonal liabilities, posing challenges for educational interventions designed to help these couples.

 

Materialism & shallowness strongly linked to marriage problems - new study

A study  of 1,700 married couples, published Oct. 14, 2011 in the Journal of Couple & Relationship Therapy, found, as reported in "Can't Buy Love: Materialism Kills Marriages" - ABC News 10-13-11:

Materialism was associated with spouses having lower levels of responsiveness and less emotional maturity ... less effective communication, higher levels of negative conflict, lower relationship satisfaction, and less marriage stability,"

The correlation between materialism and marital difficulties remained stable regardless of the actual wealth of the couple.

Jason Carroll, Brigham Young University professor of family life, was lead author of the study.

Other studies have shown that materialism is correlated with a host of personality traits and interpersonal skills that might hinder a marriage.

For one out of every five couples in the study, both partners admitted a strong love of money. These couples were worse off in terms of marriage stability, marriage satisfaction, communications skills and other metrics of healthy matrimony that researchers studied.

The one out of seven couples that reported low-levels of materialism in both partners scored 10 to 15 percent higher in all metrics of marital quality and satisfaction. 

Relationships usually fare better when partners share priorities and values, but researchers found that the opposite was true in this case. When only one partner was materialistic and the other not, the non-materialistic partners seemed to buoy the marriage, resulting in higher levels of satisfaction, communication and stability in marriages made of mismatched couples when compared to dual-materialistic ones.

"Spouses that are mismatched on materialism may do better in their relationships than spouses with shared materialistic values because at least one spouse may possess more 'other-centeredness' and 'emotional readiness,'" said Laura Frame, clinical psychologist and supervisor of the Supporting Healthy Relationships Program at Montefiore Medical Center in New York City.

 Researchers gauged materialism using self-report surveys that asked questions such as to what extent do you agree with these statements? "I like to own things to impress people" or "money can buy happiness." 

Most causes of divorce low-conflict, reversible

What is the Leading Cause of Divorce?

Excerpt: Most marriages that end in divorce are attributable, says Ms. Stevens, to low-conflict causes and not adultery, scandal, etc. She puts the figure on low-conflict divorce at 60%. What happens in low-conflict divorce. We stop paying attention to our spouses. We play the blame game; we project our failings on our spouse.